How to Live Before You Die

March 14th, 2010 § 0 comments § permalink

You’ll be dead sooner than you think. No kidding! Really! What are you doing with your life until then?

Written by Everett Bogue | Follow me on Twitter.

A few days ago I had a brief muscle spasm in my left arm. It stopped after a short while, but not before I remembered Jill Bolte Taylor’s Stroke of Insight. I’m having a stroke (I thought!)

Anyway I’ll spare you the imagined details, but I’d momentarily convinced myself that I was probably going to die mere days after my 25th birthday.

Well, I’m still here and have regained a normal feeling arm, but there is a way that thinking about your own death can stick with you for a few days.

You can die at any moment, and it could happen at any time.

Here are a couple of meditations on death, in regards to the topics that I write about here at Far Beyond The Stars.

1. You can’t take it with you.

It’s a well known cliche at this point, when you pass on most your stuff goes in the trash. No one cares anymore.  I know some people will disagree with me on this, and have stories to prove me otherwise. There will always be someone who will save a dead person’s stuff, but the majority of everyone won’t.

I’ve seen the stuff that people leave behind. Most of it only has meaning to the deceased.

2. Being safe won’t save you.

So many people live their lives in fear of dangerous things happening to them. In some cases this is justifiable fear, but in a lot of cases it’s not. Staying inside your house won’t save you from death, it will lead to you dying inside from not seeing the world.

Get out and live your life, every single day.

3. Do the best with the time you have.

You only have so much time, do your best with it. If you aren’t happy with your situation, you need to start making a change. Sitting around complaining about it won’t make a difference.

Try to spend every day working toward your ideal reality.

4. Buying stuff is not living your life.

I know, the advertisers tell you otherwise every single day. This is why you should destroy your TV, because the ads are making you feel inadequate, so you go out to the store and buy another pair of shoes. You only need one pair of shoes, make it a good pair and they’ll last you three years. In truth, your consumption is destroying the planet, so stop doing it.

Going to the store does not equal living your life. Instead, seek experiences over consumption, and you’ll be much happier with your life.

5. What would you do if you only had a week to live?

I love this exercise, even if it’s so morbid. Steve Jobs lives his life as if every day is the last, and look at what he’s managed to accomplish.

Take a moment and dreamline what you’d do, if you had only a week to live. Actually write this down. Chances are it won’t involve sitting at a desk waiting until 5pm. Can you make every day into your last week? Imagine how much happier you’d be.

6. Having less can encourage you to find peace and happiness inside yourself.

When you remove all the clutter, you have a huge opportunity to search for the depth of ordinary existence. Many people fill up their lives with junk, because we’ve been taught by advertising that buying stuff will make us happy. It doesn’t do anything but give you a momentary spark of adrenalin.

When you remove all the nonsense, you start to see the wisdom at the basis of reality. This is very hard work, but I believe that every has the ability to ask these questions of themselves. Trust me, the answers are worth seeking.

As for me, I’m going to do my best to create my ideal reality every day.

At the moment, I’m listening to a live string quartet at Tea Lounge in Brooklyn. It’s beautiful.

Today might be my last, I want it to be a good one. Don’t you?

Ash has thoughts on this as well.


Write a few sentences about your last week on earth and leave it in the comments, if you feel comfortable. I’d love to hear how you’ll spend it.

Retweet this story if it helped you. Thank you so much.

The Minimalist Guide to Sex

October 14th, 2009 § 0 comments § permalink

Post written by Everett Bogue | Follow me on Twitter

It’s Wednesday, it’s raining lightly, it’s a bit chilly here in the Pacific Northwest. Inevitably my mind is going to wander to…. the subject of sex. Yes folks, we here at Far Beyond The Stars are taking it there, and we’re going all in.

Minimalism and sex fit together like…

Sex is a powerful thing, it’s one of those rituals in life that can save you, or destroy you; bring you vast pleasures, or immense sorrow. Some folks sleep with a few people in their lives, others sleep with legions of horny individuals. I, personally, have taken a very minimalist approach to sex (at least until my girlfriend and I are in the same room, together again.)

Mom and dad, don’t read any further, I beg of you. You’ll just feel gross afterward.

Now, Minimal sex isn’t no sex. Having no sex is what inanimate objects do, and we’re leaving breathing life forms, so don’t deny yourself, please. But if you must have sex with strangers you meet in dirty bars, rock protected! People really do get diseases if they’re not careful.

Here are my five guidelines to Minimalist Sex.

Quality over quantity.
People get their kicks a lot of different ways, but in my experience, the best sex is the kind you’re having with one person. Doing it five times a day can be exhilarating, but as a seasoned professional, I’d like to suggest keeping the volume down as well. Too much sex can lead to boredom, burnout, and eventual disinterest (and potential injury!) Infrequent sex keeps your mutual interest going strong.

Keep it simple.
Women and men like it many ways, but some of them like particular ways more than others. Ask your partner which position she likes best, and make that your exclusive focus–experimentation is fun once in awhile, but for your average lovely before-sleep sex? Keep it simple.

Take it slow and easy (at least for a little while.)
This is universal, at least in my experience: everyone likes it to start slow. Light some candles, undress one item at a time. If you take it slower, the experience will last longer and also be more pleasurable for both of you. You’re not jack-hammering concrete here, you’re engaging intimately with a human being.

Make every time count.
Ask yourself the question, before you’re yanking your clothes off in front of someone that you don’t know too well: “Will this make me feel better about myself?” because, it really does matter. Meaningless sex is just that, meaningless. So why are you doing it when you can meaninglessly masturbate?

Wait for it.
The minimalist approach to sex defines waiting in two ways: one, make your sex last as long as possible (see take it slow.) and two, don’t have it all the time! Infrequent sex can be extremely rewarding, because you’ll spend a week waiting in eager anticipation for the lovin’ to go down.

Only with someone you love.
A minimalist doesn’t give his or her love indiscriminately. They wait until they’re with someone who they adore with the utmost enthusiasm, and then they let lose with their extreme lovemaking power.

There are a million things you can do in the world that are more rewarding than having sex with someone who you don’t like. So instead of going back to not-so-sure-about’s place and banging with your eyes closed, go take a yoga class! Or eat fresh vegetables! Or sit on your roof and watch the sunset. I promise you, that the sunset is so much better.


If you liked this story, email it to your boyfriend, girlfriend, or fuck-buddy friend who you adore dearly but don’t really want to go out to dinner with. Maybe they’ll reward you with something nice. If you’re sitting all alone in your room wishing you had a lover, tweet about it!

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